There is a time and place for almost everything we do in life, and often there is the long version and the short version. You normally sleep a full night, but you might also take short naps. You usually sit down to a full meal, but you might also stop at the corner burrito shop for lunch on the run. Arguments might be made to the pros and cons in either of these examples, but in the case of sex, the "quickie" often gets the bad rap.

For women, the common feeling is that the quickie means the man gets some sex. Women usually take longer to even warm up to sex. It's a double-edged sword for her - she may want it but she won't likely get much out of it except frustration. This isn't the case with the "Tantric Quickie."

The concept of a quickie implies that there is a long version, as so there is. Tantric sexuality is often a deep, intimately extended experience that can produce waves of hot, sensual sex woven with slow, focused merging. As a couple gets more involved in the practices of breath, focus, and sustaining the high states of arousal an interesting thing happens - they both get much quicker at achieving the high states of arousal.

So the practice becomes setting aside the time for long lovemaking sessions and short, sweet ones, too. Ten minutes will do for the quickies. The suggestion is once or twice a day, and regular, like going to the gym. Put it in your schedule!

Here are some possible quickies scenarios. Each of these is ten minutes only:

• Each morning, before the two of you get up, make love. Spend just a couple of the minutes getting each other stimulated and then go right to intercourse. Use a position that has you facing each other, eyes open. Neither of you will have an orgasm at first, and the man should never ejaculate. Orgasm is not the point. Connecting is the point.
• Another morning option is to lie facing each other and eye gaze for the ten minutes. After five minutes of soft, slow breathing, pick up the pace of the breath. Together, do ten rapid breathes and then follow this set with one slow, deep breath. Repeat the fast pattern three times. This is a "charging breath" and will really get you up and enthusiastically ready for the day.
• Every night, except those where you have designed a long, delicious encounter, and even if you are very tired, spend ten minutes doing either of the above. Preferably this will be lovemaking. Keep it to ten minutes and men, don't ejaculate. In the case of the breathing, reverse the order from fast to slow breaths.
• Try a little risky behavior. Have sex somewhere you might not usually have it. Have a quickie in the bathroom, kitchen, or in the car at night. Keep it safe, but with a slight edge. Maybe the backyard would be a good choice, or the bathroom of your favorite restaurant (five minutes!).
• Arrive somewhere ten minutes early. Stay in the car and stimulate each other for ten minutes only. Don't be late.
• Surprise each other with ten minutes of oral sex. This can be for one of you this time. Gift your partner, but keep it to ten minutes and don't ejaculate, men.

The point of a "Tantric Quickie" is to:

• Heighten your sexual energy
• Get practice at being "ready" almost immediately (especially for women)
• Train men to last longer and feel their sexual energy without expending it
• Fuel a heightened sexual tension between the two of you
• Quickly increase the level of intimacy between the two of you.
• Help raise testosterone levels in women and men who are getting a little older

You will both get better at this very fast. You will find it highly erotic and very useful for your general energy levels throughout the day. It's better than a shot of espresso coffee and you'll both find yourselves thinking of the other a lot more. These suggestions will take a few weeks for you to fully feel the results. Try it, you'll like it!