New positions are possibly the best way to introduce variety and interest into a sexual relationship. They can be exciting, a little challenging, and often inspiring. There are really only a handful of basic positions but there are many, many variations on each of the basic ones, leading to greater pleasure for any couple.
Asanas or Positions of the Kama Sutra
The Kama Sutra is often seen as the ultimate catalog of sexual positions. It’s a good start but there are other love manuals with different positions and techniques that the Kama Sutra doesn’t detail. As you study this book, to make it easier, remember the basic categories and then explore the variations within each, rather than trying to remember 101 different positions. If something you read or see excites you, try it soon.
You can count on having new things to talk about and learn together when you investigate new positions. When exploring them with a sense of fun, they will lead to laughter, confusion, communication, and a sense of accomplishment. You’ll probably find that some will work well for you, and some just won’t work at all.
One of the great discoveries about positions is that after you’ve tried a few new ones, much of your awkwardness or reluctance will disappear. You’ll find yourself being willing to try other new things with your lover. That’s what makes exploring different positions so important. This form of trying something new will often lead to a transformed sexual relationship.
Not only are new positions fun to try they are often the key for women to learn how to increase their pleasure and help create the possibility of vaginal or G-spot orgasms. Men will also get much more satisfaction from intercourse by discovering positions that increase their stamina and give them better control over how long they last.
The Great Variety of Positions
There are as many positions for sexual intercourse as there are possibilities in the creative mind. Having an open and adventurous mind will help you and your partner bring more playful energy into the quest for new, exciting sexual pursuits like exploring positions. Keep your spirit open to extraordinary possibilities and they will come.
Explorers of the Past
Can you even begin to imagine how many couples have studied the love guides from the past? Maybe millions – you are in good company. Love guides from India, China, Persia, Japan, Arabia, and even some of the North American Indian tribes have found their way into our modern culture. Many have a history of being secret societies and the teachings were only available to a few. It is a gift to have the wisdom of the scholars that put down these teachings in writing for us today.
Sexual positions held a more important role than we think of them today. They were often thought to be magical diagrams that lovers would arrange themselves in for spiritual transcendence. Not only yogic skills but conscious effort was put into forming the shapes and creating the experiences for extraordinary sexual intimacy.
A Subtle Shift Equals Perfection
There are many subtle variations on each major group of positions. Don’t abandon a new position right away if it’s not working for you. See what happens when you move a leg a little to the left or right or put a pillow under your bottom to lift your pelvis or shift from one knee to the other.
Ancient cultures that advanced lovemaking to an art form kept many props close by to help them. Have available pillows of varying sizes and shapes like crescent moons, rounds and squares to use under heads, arms, legs, buttocks, tummies and feet to subtly change angles and positions. High headboards, love swings, and even the floor may all have their place in your lovemaking repertoire. Get creative and keep it fun!
For More Fun - Communicate
When trying anything new, keep the communicating going. Say what you like and what doesn’t work for you. The truth is you both really want to know what the other one wants and likes.
Remember, very few of us are mind readers, and our partner may change their mind, anyway. So when in doubt, ask. If your partner is quieter than you are, encourage them to speak. Ask “multiple-choice” questions, such as, “Do you prefer that I do this faster or slower?” or “Do you like this harder or softer?” Even if the answer is “none of the above,” just knowing that you care can give partners the courage to speak up.
Sexercises- Your Love Muscles
A healthy, fit, and limber body responds best to the demands you may put on it during great sex. Whether it’s vigorous or meditative sex, new, interesting positions or a desire to be more present, a supple body works best. You’ll go to the gym to tone your outer body but how about your interior muscles?
Sexercises are exercises that get you in tip-top shape for sex. Sex can be exercise but when you tend to do it the same way every time, sexercises can give you a new frame of reference. Orgasms become stronger when the PC (puboccygeus) muscle groups are healthy and strong. These exercises help keep your bladder strong, your arousal levels up, and your sexual repertoire sophisticated. They are best known to help strengthen and tone the whole pelvic floor to prevent things like incontinence during middle and older age. When your PC muscles get regular exercise you will find that it actually turns you on.
You will better be able to identify and distinguish your G-spot and anal muscles when your PC muscles are in good shape. As you perfect these exercises and strengthen the muscles you’ll begin to notice that you can isolate distinctly separate groups of muscles in your pelvic floor. This enables you to isolate your clitoris, for instance, and stimulate yourself at any time. It’s an excellent trick for getting yourself “juiced up” for a hot date or romantic evening.
You may even be able to train yourself to have orgasms in this manner. Kegel exercises increase blood flow to the pelvic region, which aids in the increased flow of hormones and helps engorge the vaginal area. With increased blood supply and stronger muscles you’ll be preparing yourself for better, stronger and more amazing orgasms. Your G-spot is directly energized and stimulated when you are doing your Kegels.
Men will create stronger muscles for firmer erections and increase the angle that their penis stands up at by doing these exercises. In addition to amazing sexual prowess a man’s prostate and bladder will become much healthier. Mastery of these sexercises are the first step to ejaculation mastery because they teach you to become much more aware of your pelvic floor and allow you to recognize how to completely relax. Relaxation is a key to ejaculation control mastery.
Pompoir and the Mare’s Trick
Women throughout history have been known for their sexual tricks and abilities. Though many of these tricks are beyond what the modern woman might want to accomplish, they are fun never-the-less to know about. You’ll get partially good at them if you do your Kegel sexercises even marginally regularly.
Pompoir
Pompoir is the art of “milking” the lingam of your partner. When the PC muscles are in very good shape they have the ability to sort of ripple when they are squeezing. Because there are so many overlapping muscle groups in the pelvis area the now strong muscles can isolate themselves and the owner can operate them in isolation, too. As you get better at your practices, women, you’ll notice how affectively you can isolate those muscles.
This rippling affect also happens during an intense orgasm in a woman. The rippling causes a kind of milking action that starts at one end and moves along the vagina. This then translated to the action being felt by the penis, hence, the milking affect.
The Mare’s Trick
The Mare’s Trick is the ability to hold your lover’s penis inside of you and not let it go. This is best done in one of the positions like The Clasping Position or the Twinning Positions. The woman brings her legs tightly together while also tightening her vaginal muscles. If she is very good at it the blood won’t leak back out of her lover’s penis and he won’t get soft.
Thrusting Techniques
One thing great lovers have learned is that it isn’t just about in and out during intercourse – it’s about creating a kind of dance. Subtle moves, noticing what your partner responds to, and knowing some great tricks – this is what makes lovemaking a treat. Varying your thrusting patterns, while you pay attention to your lover’s pleasure clues will turn you into a great lover.
Try staying shallow and then surprising her with three deep thrusts. Create a dance of churning, deep thrusting, and then shallow thrusting and then reverse the dance. This is where the sexercises come in to use. They will build up your stamina and allow you to get very creative with your love moves.
Classic patterns for thrusting have come from some of the ancient Chinese erotic books. One such pattern that is suggested is nine deep thrusts, then one shallow (and slow) and eight deep thrusts, then two shallow and seven deep thrusts, and so on. You increase one type as you decrease the other.
Shallow thrusting stimulates the G-spot area more effectively. Generally, a woman will like deep thrusting and shallow thrusting at different times during arousal. Ask your partner what she likes best. Try making up your own patterns with the help of your partner.
Go slowly, eye gaze, and take deep breaths into your bellies as you pay attention to the patterns. The breath carries the intense feelings throughout your body. It will expand and heighten the pleasure you are feeling and carry it throughout your body.
Thrusting patterns allow the man to get very excited and then transfer that excitement to the woman. Keeping track of where you are in the pattern, men, will help you control your ejaculatory response levels, too. Don’t get too lost in the act of keeping track, though. You’ll get better at being able to focus both on what you are doing and the pleasure you are feeling as you practice these techniques more often.
Tips and Hints
As you take things a few steps deeper your understanding will increase. Sexuality can be transformational so having a few "extra" hints to add to your practices and new techniques always helps to keep the learning and growth moving forward.
Breathing
It will never be said enough – breathing is vitally important. Deep breathe into your belly during all sexual activity. Use faster breathing techniques to enhance and build your sexual energy and response. Use slower breaths to retain control and slow your response rate down. With a little practice you’ll notice the difference in arousal and response.
Getting the Clitoris Involved
Vatsyayana said, in the Kama Sutra, that the female should be excited first by using the hand to stimulate her clitoris before the man enters her for intercourse. Contrary to popular belief there aren’t really many positions that directly stimulate the woman’s clitoris. Partners have to go out of their way to get the clitoris involved in most intercourse positions. Of course, there are things you can do to stimulate the clitoris during lovemaking.
In positions where the two of you are lying very close together, try rubbing back and forth, head to toe, instead of thrusting. This action rubs the clitoris sufficiently to stimulate it to orgasm. The Clasping Position and the Twinning Position are great for this.
In the rear-entry positions either the man or the woman can use their free hands to stimulate the clitoris. The woman can stimulate her own clitoris when she is in some of the female superior positions. The male superior position The Splitting of a Bamboo also offers the opportunity to stimulate the woman’s clitoris with the hands.
Visualization
Here's a Tantric exercise you can add to your Kegel practice if you choose to: Add visualization to your Kegel exercises. It is a fine way to begin an introduction to meditation practice or advance an already existing meditation practice. Sit in a quiet place and begin your exercises. As you progress, hold a picture or thought in your mind that you have decided on before you began the exercise. It can be as simple as Love, or Gratitude, or the vision of Health or Energy.
You can even take it as far as imagining light or energy passing up your body and out the top of your head. An even more advanced practitioner might imagine the energy going up their spine, out their head and then re-circulate it down the front of their body back to the genitals. This is how the Taoists re-circulate the orgasmic energy to have it available to them throughout the day.
As you pump your muscles, you will be pumping up your energy. You can also visualize your G-spot or your clitoris while doing these exercises. By doing so you will have a mental picture of these two arousal areas and be able to better visualize them while making love. This will aid you in developing your orgasmic capacity.
Know Yourself and Don’t Rush
Remember - only do what feels comfortable at any one moment. You can always come back to the exercise. Don't continue if you feel like you're going to hyperventilate, cramp, or you need a break, or even if you need to have an emotional moment because of an experience you are having. It will often take almost everyone that begins these practices a little while to get into the flow. Be gentle with yourself. Have fun.
