A: Truthfully it's some of both. In Tantra, creating the mood is often called "creating sacred space", and it's an important ingredient. There are beautiful, simple rituals to accomplish this. Many women are getting hip enough to know when the classic "mood makers" (e.g., champagne, candle light dinner, roses, etc.) are actually strategies for conquest, instead of actual gestures from the guy's heart. Here's a great idea for you men: In addition to offering the mood-makers that please her, do the things that you like to create mood and ambiance for yourself so that you get in the mood for being genuinely, loving, affectionate, caring, attentive, as well as romantic and turned on. Watch what happens and by all means get back to me with your results!